Only The Good Die Young

Upon hearing the recent news of Glee star Cory Monteith's death, naturally, I was upset. Death is upsetting. The thing about celebrity deaths is that most people don't know how to immediately react. Some are crying into their pillows with their legs flailing in the air on top of them. Others say, "Poor thing" or "Well, it was bound to happen eventually" and go on with their days as they normally would.

Like a lot of young females around my age, I first caught a glimpse of Cory Monteith in the pilot episode of FOX's Glee after the season 8 finale of American Idol (anyone else remember the tragic results of that season? Yup. Kris Allen vs Adam Lambert). The show went off my radar for a while, but I eventually became one of those horrid Gleeks about a year later. I even performed some of the show's arrangements with my high school choir group. (I'm desperately trying to suppress the memory of singing "Don't Stop Believin'"just fyi). I stopped watching the show last fall after losing interest and not being able to motivate myself to illegally stream any of the episodes.

The first reports of Cory's death had a big "overdose" trailing after cause of death speculation, but, as of this very moment, it's still quite uncertain to the general public what caused such a promising star to suddenly kick his almighty bucket and turn out the lights for good. Whether it was a bad cocktail of a little bit of this and just a pinch of that or something else, seeing the news of Cory's passing still remains a reminder that no one (whether in the glimmer of fame and fortune or not) is immortal and out of death's sexy grip.

The dimples, for my lady readers. 

Famous names like River Phoenix, who died from a heroine/cocaine overdose outside Hollywood's The Viper Room in 1993 at the age of 23, and Heath Ledger, who died after taking a cocktail of prescription drugs in 2008 at the age of 28, are attached to both great talent and the sadness that drug
abuse brings to fans all over the world. Other names like Michael Jackson, Janis Joplin, Elvis, and sex goddess Marilyn Monroe also come coated in the bitter taste of the kiss of death with a hint of overdose.

The thing, though, is that people have this idea that if you're young, you can't die. Just look at that shitty saying that people are passing around like a bad case of mono. YOLO. You only live once. I mean, yes, it's true, but isn't it more appropriate to say, "You only die once?" Too bad YODO doesn't roll off the tongue quite like sounding like a douchebag does. That, and I doubt Kanye or Justin Bieber could concoct a clever rhyme or pun to go with it.

Wait. Let me try.

Yodo... Yo... do... Yo Dough. 

I just did, and I don't even rap, so erase that reason.

While I won't cry myself to sleep over Cory's death any time soon, my sympathies go out to the cast of Glee, Cory's family, and to his large, supportive group of loyal fans during this difficult time.

As for my readers, if I find out any of you overdose (either accidentally or intentionally) on any kind of substance and die, I will personally come kick your ass and kill you. Yes, I know what I just said. Laugh, peasants!

4Ever Alone on Valentine's Day

With one week until Valentine's Day, I thought it'd be a good time to talk about being single or alone on a day that's all about sexy times with sexy people and heart-shaped things. Let's face it, a lot of people have this unhealthy grudge against the 14th day of February because they're upset that they don't have a significant other to share the day with. Seeing coworkers or friends receive bouquets of roses or those nasty boxes of gourmet chocolate can be so totally unbearable for those who haven't learned to love being single. So, what can you do on Valentine's Day alone? Well, I've made a pretty damn lame awesome list to help give you some ideas!

HERE WE GO!

1. Get caught up on all the seasons of your favorite TV shows! Still can't manage to get passed the second season of Glee? Here's a good excuse! It's not like you have anything else to do. Also, it might help you remember how much your life doesn't suck. After all, you could be in the glee club! Or take this as an opportunity to start a new show! Netflix is full of great stuff (except they still don't have Friends which kind of really sucks)

2. Eat your damn chocolate (or whatever your favorite candy is). Just because it's not that nasty gourmet stuff doesn't mean it shouldn't be eaten! No one is around to judge you based on what you consume, so indulge! You can worry about gaining weight another time. Tonight, it's all about you and Mr.Hershey. 

Yup, right into your vagina, Rose.

3. Watch Titanic. Do I seriously need to explain this one? It's one of the greatest cinematic love stories of all time. PLUS, you get to see post-sex Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet's hard-ass nipples. Who needs porn when you've got that? And this is probably the closest you're going to get to sex tonight. Right? Right. 

4. Serenade the posters on your bedroom walls like you did when you were 13. You know you're totally guilty of either singing or lip-syncing to your celebrity crushes as they hang on your walls or wherever you keep that kind of stuff. So, pick out your favorite love songs and grab your hairbrush because things are about to get crazy up in here! (This also can act as a great cardio workout depending on how crazy things get)

Oh I thought you said 5 shades of suck

5. Read  Fifty Shades of Grey. You know you've always been curious... Just go for it! What happens of Valentine's Day stays on Valentine's Day (unless it's an unwanted pregnancy... then that might come back to bite you in 9 months)

6. Call up your other single friends and have a girls/guys night. It's proven that people are less miserable when they share their misery with other people. Maybe have a sleepover or head to the bar and have drinks. Doesn't matter what you do, as long as you're with people just as miserable as you. 

7. Call your grandma. I really doubt your grandma is going to be up to much (if she is, WAY TO GO GRANDMA!) so why not ring her up and catch up on life at the nursing home. Maybe exchange knitting tips and recipes. 

8. Do whatever you usually do regardless of the day having a title. Homework? Laundry? Get really drunk? Whatever it is, do it. After all, Valentine's Day isn't even a real holiday if it doesn't get you a day off work or school. 

Valentine's Day doesn't have to be about having sex or being in a relationship with someone. It's about taking the time to tell the people you love (both romantically and platonically) that you love them. You don't need chocolate or flowers or mix-CD's to do that job. Just speak from your heart in the best way that you can. Don't pass it up. You might regret it later on.

Don't forget that February 15th means chocolate goes on sale, so stock up for the rest of the year! You'll be glad you did!